Every now and then, I forget my lack of “Girling” skills, lose my mind, and buy a bottle of deep red frosted nail polish. Gorgeously evil dark red, nearly burgundy. You know, the shade of nail polish that surely The Evil Queen wore in Snow White.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Usually I do this while DMc is out of town, so he doesn’t see the unfortunate results. Travel is down for him due to budget cuts, though, and the holidays are making me a tad itchy, and there was this coupon for Sally Hansen, soooo\u2026ya know.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
On Evil Queen Red Sunday, DMc was napping while I tried to give myself a manicure. He woke up, walked into the kitchen, and saw my hands before I’d had a chance to clean up with acetone and pointy Q-tips.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
DMc: *urgently patting down my abdominal area<\/em>* Fast forward several days and I have remembered why dark nail polish sucks. The tips wear and chip if you so much as wash your hands thoroughly. Dammit!<\/p>\n\n\n\n So, still under the mistaken impression that I can Girl, I try a color very like Old Hollywood Gold Lame. Turns out that glittery nail polish will glom onto your cuticles in a way that looks like you did something seriously profane to a pixie. Not only that, but it is aggravatingly harder to wipe up than the Evil Queen Dark Red. Gaaaah!<\/p>\n\n\n\n This is why I have a drawer full of nail polish colors and only use clear on my fingers. *sigh*<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Every now and then, I forget my lack of “Girling” skills, lose my mind, and buy a bottle of deep…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wprm-recipe-roundup-name":"","wprm-recipe-roundup-description":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-461","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-random-ramblings"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/outsidevoice.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/461","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/outsidevoice.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/outsidevoice.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/outsidevoice.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/outsidevoice.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=461"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/outsidevoice.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/461\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":462,"href":"http:\/\/outsidevoice.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/461\/revisions\/462"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/outsidevoice.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=461"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/outsidevoice.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=461"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/outsidevoice.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=461"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
TMc: What are you doing?
DMc: Checking to see if you got the bleeding stopped after you gave yourself an appendectomy with your fingers!<\/em>
TMc: Fucker.<\/p>\n\n\n\n